Exactly a year ago today I found out I was pregnant. Wes was just two lines on a stick and now he's a chubby, happy 4 month old. I cannot believe how fast this year has flown by. Also? I would get SO MAD when people would say to me, "You're pregnant? HA. You'll never sleep again!" I always thought I'd sleep when the baby sleeps. The baby has to sleep sometime. I couldn't understand why people were always so negative about babies and sleep. Ha. Ha. Ha. Yes, those people were right. BUT the fun of watching this little human become interactive and social is incredible. It is also overwhelming when I think about his need and dependence on me...forever. I get scared when I think about the new challenges that I'll encounter as he gets older and I realize it will never get easier. I spent the first 8 weeks of his life longing for it to be easier and I think most of that longing was the adjustment of going from no kids to such a huge responsibility. I remember a few days after his birth watching Ilmar walk around our house and I thought to myself: how can he just walk around like everything is completely normal when my life just completely changed?
I really love being his mom and it's crazy to think that only a year has passed since I started anticipating his (unique) arrival. It truly feels like ages ago and it also feels like yesterday.
Absolutely nothing can prepare you for motherhood - nothing. Not even dogs. You can't understand it until your in it. I think that's why moms tend to gravitate towards each other; you're just desperate for someone who is going through the same things as you to tell you it's normal and they've been there. I've reconnected with many friends since having a baby because many of us had babies in the past year. I definitely look forward to the facebook messages and emails we exchange. Once Wes gets a little older and more mobile I'm going to look into joining a mom's group in my area. I had tried to join a few weeks ago but every time we set up a time to meet, Wes was napping! Go figure. My hope and goal for right now is to just get through each day. It's hard when I'm so tired and I'm hoping his sleep will improve. I didn't want to say anything in case Wes is reading this but the other night he did a 5.5 hour stretch and last night he did a 4 hour stretch. The 4 hour stretch was a bit disappointing, he woke up and wasn't hungry...just awake and needed assistance getting back to sleep. I did rock him to sleep and he stayed asleep another 1.5 hours and then was ready to eat. I think he was up every 2 after that but I didn't keep track like I normally do because I was barely waking up for the feedings. I'm heading over to the library today to pickup the Ferber book. I just want to read it and see if sleep training is route I need/want to take. I am always so riddled with worry that I did something wrong with Wes...if I did a disservice to him and somehow prevented him from learning good sleep habits. Did I prevent him from learning to self soothe and fall back to sleep on his own because I always gave him a pacifier for naps and bedtime? I just can't wait for all of this to be behind me one day, I really can't. Worrying sucks.
Do you have any sleep advice or tips? Please share them with me!
A few posts down I mentioned I was going to be positive and that nothing could be worse than Weston's 4-5 awakenings at night. Well, he must be reading this blog because it got worse. I didn't realize how good past me had it, after nursing Wes would fall right back to sleep and few nights I got 3 hour chunks in there. I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS SUPPOSE TO SAVOR THAT. Here's how last night went:
6:14PM-10:49AM (4:35) - let me add, I had to go in and give him his paci about 4 times in this first chunk
11:06PM-12:10 (1:03)
THEN HE WAS WIDE AWAKE AND WOULDN'T GO BACK TO SLEEP OMG YOU MUST BE KIDDING ME. I nursed him and it did nothing. I gave him his paci and he was still rolling around playing with his hands staring at me. I finally rocked him and it was sooooooooooooo annoying. I had to turn the nightlight out I've used since day 1 because he wouldn't stop looking at the ceiling fan. He kept arching his back, making it difficult for me to hold him to look at things. Not once have I ever, in his 4 months of existence, had to get out of bed and rock him after nursing. Never.
1:07 ASLEEP! YAYAYAYAYA
2:07 AWAKE - NOOOOOO
2:15-3:31 (1:15)
3:39-5:14 (1:35)
and at 5AM I rocked him again because I did not want him or myself up for the day. No. I couldn't do it. I got another 55 minutes out of him, 6:12 - 7:07 but it took me an hour to get that. I'm so tired. So tired. I just can't do this anymore. Really. I can't. I'd love to go back to a few days ago when he was at least GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER WAKING UP. This is ridiculous. I don't know how I'm going to make it through the day and night again. I just don't. I'm running on about 4 hours of sleep I think and none of that was consecutive hours.
Today was Weston's first big outing and I was nervous, I didn't want to do it. I take him to my mom's house every week and he's been to a few picnics at friend's houses nearby. Obviously he goes to the grocery store, Target and various other places with me regularly during the week. But this was different, we were going to a little sandbar on the Delaware River, only reachable by boat or jet ski. I guess it's probably first time mom stress but I really hate being out with him and worrying about how I'm going to get him to nap. He is a crappy nighttime sleeper so I really like to make sure he has good naps and he goes down so easily for naps for me at home. I blast the white noise, lay him in his crib, hangout in case he drops his paci and he's usually out within 10 minutes. I struggle with naps at my mom's house, he doesn't really like the PNP and it sucks. So today, I had no idea what I was going to do when nap time came. We decided to setup a tent and I'd bring his PNP mattress for him to lay on. I got lucky and he fell asleep on the drive over and I sat in my car with him until he woke up, I think he slept for over an hour. It worked perfectly because the people we were meeting weren't there yet and my husband was able to drive his jet ski to the sandbar to setup the tent and bring over all the crap I lugged along. So after his nap he was wonderful, in a great mood! It was lovely. But then he started getting fussy and I realized it was nap time since he was awake for about 2 hours at that point. I laid with him in the tent and he didn't go to sleep. I tried and Ilmar tried for about an hour. Now he has been awake for 3 hours and it was quickly going downhill and not fun for me (or Wes). I grew tired of holding him and swaying (he's 15lbs! My poor arms) and he just wasn't settling down in the tent and was super fussy/unhappy. Luckily I drove separate from my husband so I decided I wanted to leave and he could stay, I was happy I wouldn't have to wait for him to pull the jet ski out of the water, take down the tent...blah blah blah. I knew Wes was going to pass out in his car seat and he did! Immediately! He slept for over an hour again and I ended up sitting in my driveway for 20 or so minutes until he woke up. I enjoyed the 2 hours I got to socialize with my friends, first time I've seen a lot of them this summer. Days like this really drive home the fact that my whole life has changed. I'm at home, just finished putting the baby to bed and everyone is drinking and enjoying the gorgeous weather on the water. Luckily I'm so sleep deprived that I'm too tired to really care, but I do care. The adjustment is huge, especially because we are the first in our group to have a baby. I hope things get easier and we can do more next summer. I also hope I am getting more sleep by next year!
(Look at his chins. Look at them. Can you stand it?)
I read somewhere on the internet, in regards to child rearing, that the days are long but the years are fast. I can see how that is true. Today, for me, is a long one. Weston slept from 7:30PM - 11:00PM (3:35 hours) woke up, nursed, and slept from 11:14PM - 2:06AM (2:52 hours) woke up, nursed and slept from 2:44AM - 3:36AM (51 freakin minutes) woke up, nursed and slept from 3:43AM - 5:04AM (1:21 hours) and was up for the day at 5:04AM. Usually I put him in his Pack N Play (in our bedroom) at 5AM and he'll hangout and coo for 45 minutes or so and I try to sleep then I bring him back to bed and we sleep for another 45 minutes to an hour and get up for the day. Not today. Nope. He was up at 5 and I tried twice to put him back down and he wasn't having it. He was WIDE AWAKE. I'm so exhausted. I was sitting here, feeling sorry for myself and my broken, non sleeping baby when my sister posted something on facebook:
If you are positive and speak positive; those words become your
behaviors, behaviors become habits, habits become values and values
become your destiny and who you will be. - Mahatma Gandhi
Boy, did I need to hear that today. I think I'm drowning in a sea of negativity. On top of not much sleep, Wes has been so fussy all day. He doesn't want to be held. Doesn't want to lay down. Doesn't want to sit in his bouncy chair. He just doesn't want to do anything and I don't know what to do with him. I'm tired and I'm filled with exhaustion and negative WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME feelings.
There has to be a positive in all of this right? Yes. My baby is healthy. I'm healthy. This stage (please let it be a stage, please let it be a stage) will pass. If it doesn't pass, there are things I can do to hopefully improve it. I'll get through this and maybe one day I can help another parent out who is going through this same stage and say: hang in there, it gets better. Another positive: it CAN only get better from here. I don't see how it could get much worse than 4 nightly wakings. You know what? I take that back. I bet it could get worse and I really hope I don't experience it. So...positive! Today I am going to be positive. Tonight when I go to bed I am going to try and be positive. I am going to try and that's all I can do.
Being pregnant with you, thinking about you and imaging what you'd look like.
How many hours I spent wearing you because it was your favorite way to sleep
Your chubby, naked body in the bathtub
Swaddling you
Peeling you out of your swaddle after naps and in the morning
Your chubby cheeks
Your gummy smile
Your love of your hands
The first time I put you in the stroller
The first few days of your life
How much Kooper loved you and wanted to protect you
And best of all: the pink sleep suit you currently sleep in.
My baby is FOUR MONTHS OLD. I cannot believe it. Look at what a cute little chubster he is! His hands are in his mouth constantly these days. Speculation on Instagram concluded that they probably taste like the Dorito taco at Taco Bell so it's understandable why he munches on them so much.
Weston is very close to laughing, he does this huge wide open mouth smile and scream thing but he's close! He is trying to roll from back to belly and spends a lot of time in a very interesting C shape.
He rolled from belly to back right before he was 3 months old. I was shocked when he did it because I never did much tummy time with him because he always cried. I did wear him upright a lot so I'm assuming his neck got strong from that. I laid him on his belly one day and he rolled. It was so cute! I can't lay him on his belly now because he goes right over but sometimes he forgets and gets mad.
He had his 4 month checkup and shots last week. He is a robust 14.5lbs and I forget his length and head size.
I catch him watching TV a lot. I usually have the news on or Bravo just for background noise when I'm home and there have been a few times he's stared at the TV for awhile. My mom started putting kids shows on for him when I'm over. She's ridiculous.
We do a lot of floor time but Ilmar wanted to see if he's big enough for the Jumperoo. Sorry Wes, maybe next month.
Nicknames: Billy-Roo and Baby boy
Special skills: Eating his hands, eating anything you place in his hands, rolling to his side, smiling and babbling
Most annoying features: See my post below on sleep deprivation
Most desirable features: He's a pretty easy going baby and content most of the time. If he wakes up from a nap and is changed and fed, I can take him anywhere and never have a problem/fussy baby. He goes down fairly easily for naps (if he's tired) and just requires his paci and someone to hangout next to him for 10 or so minutes until he falls asleep.
Dislikes: When the dogs bark loudly/suddenly, when his dad sneezes loudly and being tired.
Likes: His hands, the bath, his pacifier, his Nanny
For reference:
I heard a lot of horror stories about breastfeeding before I was pregnant and while I was pregnant. It was something I really wanted to try to do but I was afraid. Hearing about sore, bloody and cracked nipples could put fear into the heart of anyone, I would think. I remember texting my sister, telling her that I was more afraid of breastfeeding than going into labor. A lot of ladies told me their stories of how they tried to breastfeed and didn't like it, couldn't do it, didn't produce enough...I never heard anything positive so I braced myself for the worst. I got lucky. Breastfeeding came easy for me. The first few days were tough of course. I had to work with Weston for 20 minutes at a time to get him to latch on and make sure he tried to nurse for at least 10 minutes to get colostrum. I know in those early days he'd always fall asleep but soon I was able to get him to latch without much effort. I definitely experienced some soreness but no bleeding and nothing cracked! There was that toe curling, 30 seconds of pain during a few initial nursing sessions but it subsided after a week or two. It took my milk FIVE DAYS (seemed like forever) to come in and on the day it came in, I got a care package from a friend. The care package contained Earth Mama Angel Baby Nipple Butter, Booby Tubes and Mother's Milk Tea. It was the most thoughtful gift and came at the exact time I needed it. I hope I can do this same thing for a friend one day too.
I used the nipple cream religiously, after every feeding. Prior I was using Lanisol but Weston hated the taste of it and I noticed on the Earth Mama package it stated it contained no Lanisol.
The Booby Tubes are AWESOME you can put them in the freezer or microwave. I kept them in freezer and would put them in my bra every night before bed, after many, many hours of daytime nursing. I really looked forward to the relief they provided.
I buy the Target brand Mother's Milk Tea now and try to drink a cup a day. I think it's an acquired taste (black licorice-y).
There are a few things I think helped with my success (so far) in breastfeeding. I know everyone is different and what worked for me may not work for you and that's okay. One thing motherhood has taught me is to NEVER judge other moms because we are all just trying to survive and however you want to feed your baby is fine with me...just feed your baby and keep on keeping on. My cousin had her baby 10 weeks early and he spent nearly 23 days in the NICU. She pumped milk for him but he was bottle fed the entire time and wouldn't nurse. She worked with him and his latch for 6 weeks when he got home because she wanted to breastfeed him and she was successful, eventually getting him to nurse! He's still going strong 7 months later. I tell you that just to show that everyone and their experience is different.
Since Weston was born at home, we were never separated. I think this really helped establish our nursing relationship. I have a picture of him nursing for the first time and it was about 30 minutes after he was born. I was comfy in my own bed. I was able to keep him on the breast as often as needed. I was also on the phone with a lactation consultant in the hours after his birth (she taught the birth class I went to) because I have flat nipples and was having a difficult time getting him to latch. She gave me a few tips and I took it from there.
I never let myself worry about my supply. I kept telling myself my body was producing what he needed and if he seemed frantically hungry I planned to break out the formula. But, he never did. He was fussy on the day my milk came in but I wasn't concerned since I knew I finally had food for him. He had a lot of poop and pee diapers everyday and I took that as a signal that he was okay and getting the nourishment he needed in those early days.
I never gave him a pacifier until 5 weeks. This wasn't on purpose, I just never thought to do it before then. He used me as a human pacifier up until that time. It was awful. It really was. I could never put him down it seemed but in retrospect I think that helped regulate my milk production. If I had known then what I know now, I would not have waited to give him a paci ( I LOVE PACIFIERS!!!) but I do think it contributed to our successful breastfeeding relationship.
I never took him to the doctor until he was 3 weeks old. My midwife is certified to provide baby care up until 6 weeks and she saw Weston 2 times before he saw the doctor. I never had a doctor telling me he wasn't gaining enough or putting doubts in my mind. The first time I did take him to the doctor, the doctor asked me to stop nursing him for 4 days and give him formula because he had a bit of jaundice. We had his blood drawn and his bilirubin levels were not high enough for concern (20 is high but Wes was 14) but that's what the doctor asked me to do anyway. I talked to my midwife and lactation consultant and did a ton of research that night about breastfeeding jaundice and decided we had a good thing going with nursing and I wasn't going to stop. I never went back to that doctor again. My midwife wanted to call the practice and complain about the 'advice' they gave me. The doctor also told me not to hold Wes too much, so as not to spoil him. I MEAN REALLY? C'mon he's 3 goddamn weeks old. He NEEDS to be held. I wish I could say I'm seeing an awesome doctor now but this one sucks too. And our insurance won't let me change again. UGH.
I did have a milk blister around 7 weeks and it was the worst thing I've ever experienced in my life. The first minute or two of nursing on the nipple that had it was EXCRUCIATING. I kept a warm compress on it before and after nursing, soaked it in Episom salt and tried to let Wes comfort nursing (omg, ouch) on it to help clear the clog as often as possible. It took a week to go away and I hope and pray it never happens again. But so far that has been my only hiccup. I really do enjoy being able to feed him anywhere, anytime. I am lazy and love not dealing with bottles. I couldn't imagine getting out of bed and going into the kitchen to make him bottles at night with how much he wakes up to eat. Learning to nurse laying down has been the best thing ever because I sleep right through his feedings, sometimes I barely wake up. This has been a lifesaver for me and my sleep deprived state.
So I'm 4 months into this whole thing and therefore an expert on baby gear! Seriously though these products I couldn't recommend enough and plan to buy for my friends when they have babies. When it came to the whole baby prep thing we really went with the bare minimum. We have a small ranch style house so I didn't want baby crap everywhere. We didn't do a nursery...I didn't have a crib until 2 weeks ago. And the only reason I have it is because it was given to me. I know having a baby in your bedroom isn't for everyone but it worked for us, especially since I am breastfeeding - it was just easier to have Weston close by when I learned to nurse him laying down. I did tire of having him IN our bed but I still wanted him close by because he wakes up a lot during the night. I currently have a sidecar crib arrangement going on and I like it a lot. I do plan to move him out of our room eventually when his sleep improves, which means I don't think it will happen in the foreseeable future.
My BrestFriend Nursing Pillow
I'm still using this pillow. It is the BEST. I don't think I ever unclipped it from my waist (except to use the bathroom) for the first 7 weeks. It saves your arms. It holds your nipple cream. It supports your back.
Lillebaby Nordic Carrier
I lived in this and still use it frequently although not as much due to the July heat. Weston was one of those babies that wanted to be held all the time. Every time I put him down for a nap if he fell asleep on me, he woke up as soon as his body brushed the sheets/bassinet/PNP/swing. It sucked. This saved my sanity. He could snuggle up on my chest and I'd clean my house, take long walks with my dog, do laundry...EAT... I realized that I watched the entire season of Nashville (over the span of a few days) on Hulu while wearing Weston in this carrier and bouncing on a yoga ball. I managed to walk everyday with him in it for 2 months. I got exercise and he napped. I'm 10lbs away from pre-pregnancy weight and I have to credit the carrier for helping/forcing me to get exercise. Now that he's bigger the carrier adjusts and his little chubby legs can dangle and the top part folds down so he can look around and see stuff. My back never hurt using this either.
MAM Pacifiers
FOR SOME REASON I DIDN'T TRY TO OFFER A PACIFIER UNTIL WES WAS 5 WEEKS OLD. I don't know why, I just didn't realize this baby likes to suck and he didn't need me to do that. Oh these saved my sanity! I'm still using them to put him down for naps and nighttime. I wish I had used them sooner, truly. Life would have been easier.
Infantino Activity Mat
I remember reluctantly adding this to my baby registry thinking it was another piece of baby crap that would take up space and we wouldn't use it. I started laying Wes on it in the mornings so I could get breakfast at around 7 weeks and I remember he would be occupied for 20-30 minutes or so. It was awesome. Now he spends a lot of his waking hours on it (mostly because I don't really know what else to do with him when he's awake) and he really, really loves looking and batting at the toys. I get down there with him and eat and check email/do work for my husband's business. He can be happy on the mat for up to an hour some days - mostly in the morning.
Halo Sleep Sacks
Weston was a baby who lost all his hand/arm privileges during sleeping times fairly early on. His startle reflex would wake him up constantly or he would gouge his eyes out with his hands, get mad, and wake up. These swaddles are awesome. I was so sad when he outgrew them length wise and also started busting out of them every night. I even double swaddle him for a few weeks to try and get more time out of them but he started breaking out of two swaddles too. Now I'm using the Baby Merlin's Magic Sleep Suit to help transition from the swaddle.
So that's how I survived the first few weeks!
I am so sleep deprived. So. So. So. Tired. I feel like I spend each day in a hazy fog. I do dumb things, I forget stuff constantly, I never, ever feel refreshed in the morning. My biggest wish is for my husband to send me to a hotel to sleep with no dogs, no baby and no distractions for just ONE night. I often think back to my last full night's sleep (March 21st, to be exact). If I had known it was the last time I'd go to sleep and wake up when I want, I would have savored it. I would have rolled around in bed until noon. I would have just slept all damn day. Weston was a typical baby, he'd wake every 2 hours or so to eat. I remember a few nights of 3 hours between feedings (I loved those) I also remember hourly wakings when he was gassy (that was rough). I just wish I had kept better track. I didn't keep a record of anything. I was an emotional, crying mess just trying to survive those first few weeks/months. I know at the end of May I started feeling like I was getting more sleep. I also learned how to nurse laying down around that time and LOVED not getting out of bed. I remember chunks of solid sleep from him for about 5, 6 hours - there was a 7 hour stretch one or two times. I remember many times after his initial stretch he'd go 3 hours between feedings (I LOVED that) but mostly he'd go 2 and that was okay. I was starting to feel somewhat more rested. I felt like I could definitely count on a solid 4 hours of sleep myself when I'd head off to bed after him. I felt like things were improving and was excited to see it get better from there. But then something terrible happened. June 26th - I'll remember this day forever. June 26th happened. I don't know what about it but my husband was away for the night and I was ready to head to bed right after I put Wes down at 7ish PM and I was going to get SO MUCH SLEEP YOU GUYS, SO MUCH. But no. I went to bed around 8ish and Wes started stirring at 10 and I remember thinking, "What the hell? You're supposed to sleep until at least midnight or 1:30!!!!!!!" Ever since that day his sleep has gone to shit. He was up every hour that night and as of today, JULY TWENTY-SECOND, he hasn't improved. The past two nights his longest stretch of sleep has been 3 hours and then up every 2 after that (which makes for a loooong night when his bedtime is 6:30-7PM) and he's up for the day at 5AM. I want to die. I don't know if this is a 3 or 4 month sleep regression or he hit the 4 month wakeful early but it sucks and I don't think it's either of those things. I think my baby is crappy sleeper and things will never improve. It feels so hopeless. I'm so tired. I just want it to fix itself without me having to DO anything, you know? I don't have the energy to do anything about it. I just want to lay my head on my pillow and sleep. That's all I want. I cry about it all the time. I'm envious of my friends without kids, friends with older kids and my friends with those magic sleeping babies who are getting SO MUCH GODDAMN SLEEP. I just don't know how I'm going to get through it. I just want to BE through it. I'm sick of people telling me to savor each moment. Yeah, I'm totally savoring each morning at 5AM when Wes starts waking up and I'm just falling asleep from his 4:30AM feeding. Yes. Savoring. That's what I'm doing over here.
The only appropriate way to start this blog would be to talk about Weston's birth. I had the most unique birth experience out of anyone I know - I delivered Weston all by myself in my living room!
Around midnight on March 22nd, I began to have strange sensations, like I had to use the bathroom but it kept happening in a pattern and I wondered if I was in labor. After using the bathroom a few times and feeling uncomfortable, I decided it was labor and I was so mad. First of all, I was 2 weeks early and I had convinced myself I would go past my due date of April 5th. I, luckily, had finished washing and putting away all of Weston's baby clothes THAT DAY (I even put the plastic sheet on my mattress, just in case!) but my house and bathroom were a mess. In every book I read about childbirth, they made it seem like during early labor you clean your entire house and it just goes on forever until you have the baby 48 hours later. My hair was dirty and I needed to shave my legs. I remember hoping I could do all these things before I had the baby. I started texting my midwife around this time and she told me to try and get some sleep, it was going to be a long night. I really wish I had been more open with her about the pain I was in but I was afraid she'd think I was a wimp (first time mom and all) and would flake out on the home birth and head to the hospital for drugs. I regret that now, I should have been way more vocal about what was going on with my body. I was uncomfortable. I was in pain. There was no way I could sleep. I got my husband from his office and told him I was in labor and he should get some sleep. I spent some more time using the bathroom and bouncing on the yoga ball and really just feeling sorry for myself that it hurt so bad, so soon and I'd have to endure HOURS of it. How was I going to do that! HOW! Soon the contractions started to feel like my body bearing down and pushing on it's own. I don't know how to describe it but it hurt. I decided to take a shower, hoping it would slow down labor. I managed to wash my hair but shave my legs? Not so much. I ended up back on the toilet, it was the only place I felt comfortable -so strange! I did have a bloody show so I knew it was the real deal and not false labor. I started making a lot of noise and my husband woke up and came to find me. It must have been around 2:30AM at this point. I asked (demanded) he take the cover off our hot tub outside because I was getting in it, I needed relief. As I was in the hot tub outside, screaming my head off. He was trying to inflate and fill up the birth pool in our living room. I kept telling him to call the midwife and get her to come over but for some reason he didn't call her. I was mad about this because I was in serious pain and felt like I needed coaching to get through it. Since I was sitting in hot water I felt a cold gush and knew my water broke. I reached down and could feel my baby's head! I screamed for my husband to call the midwife NOW, I could feel the baby's head. The midwife, Jen, instructed him to get me out of the tub - she thought it had sped up my labor. I was in so much pain there was no way I was getting out of that tub and walking. But, I had to and for some reason I ran to the corner of my living room and sat on top of the towel I had thrown there from my shower earlier. I ended up on all fours on top the towel and the pain stopped. My body was still bearing down and pushing but it didn't hurt. With every push my body was doing on it's own, I could feel my son's head coming out further and further. I also felt that burning, ring of fire sensation many ladies talk about. My husband is still scrambling around with the hose, filling up the tub even though I told him repeatedly I wouldn't get to use it. For some reason, I sat up in a squatting position and my baby literally shot out and I caught him and turned him around so he was facing me. My husband looked up and said, I quote, "holy shit is he breathing?" As soon as he said that, Weston started crying! I felt strangely calm. I asked him to bring me a towel to wrap the baby in and I stayed squatting over my towel until Jen walked through my front door about 10 minutes later. Weston was born at 4:09AM. He was perfectly healthy!
Hello! I'm Megan, first time mom to an almost 4 month old little boy, Weston. I have 3 crazy dogs and I'm married to a slightly less crazy man. I was inspired to start blogging right after my son was born but alas I was (and still am) in such a sleepless, tired haze that I never really got to writing things down and keeping a record. It makes me sad, especially because I think we've hit the 4 month wakeful (worst.thing.ever.) and I wish I could remember what W's sleep was like prior. I know it was getting better and I have hope that things will continue to improve! Well, I hope you enjoy my little corner of the internet. I plan to talk about Weston a lot, complain about my dogs a little and hopefully touch base on all the things that life throws my way in between.
